Top 10 Office 404s

For today’s #Top10Tuesday, we’re looking at #Office404s.  Just like when you’re browsing the Web and get a ‘404: something’s gone wrong‘ page, we’re looking at the trials and tribulations, the egregious errors, you have to deal with in the office each day.

From odd AC smells to perpetually jammed printers, #OfficeLife isn’t without its challenges. (And yes, we’re being a pantomime villain with this post, so please don’t take it seriously.  Always be kind to your co-workers.)

• Office Perfume

Every office gets a little whiffy at times… that’s OK. Just make sure there is no creature stuck in the AC vent, which has happened before.

Solution: Make sure your office manager adds air freshener to the list of essentials facilities products. If you initiate the order, you might even get to pick the scent.

• Jam Spreader

What happens when the least techie person in the office jams the printer? They try to fix it and make it worse. After befouling one, they move on to another.

Solution: When you see someone struggling with a printer, go ahead and help them locate the jammed page hidden under the elusive tray. You get to be the hero and save your whole office from a lot of trouble.

• Outdoors Adventure

When you realise you left your swipe card on your desk before going for a smoke. Now the doors are shut and you can’t spot anyone to let you back in.

Solution: Tie a piece of string to the building’s burglar alarm before you head out. Just yank to set it off. Security will be with you shortly.

• Slobberchopped

Beware the messy eater; the co-worker who managers to fling more food at his desk than actually ends up in their mouth. Those 4pm crumbly biscuits are tricky snacks.

Solution: Surround the miscreant with powerful fans to blow particles back toward them. They’ll end up covered in their own crumbs. That could be a classic #OfficePrank.

• Hovering Horrors

The moment you take a much-deserved break to check Facebook is the moment the hoverer stands at your shoulder, peering at your monitor like a peeping tom. (We don’t condone using office hours to catch up the latest #icebucketchallenge nominee…we never do that here at Euroffice!)

Solution: Get a privacy filter for your screen, so only you can see what it says.

• Bummer Holiday

These workers make sure the entire office knows when they’re going on holiday while you’re #StuckInTheOffice.

Solution: Outgun them… Buy a noticeboard and stick touristy postcards up from all the places you’ve been (i.e. bought on eBay).

• Adjacent Emailer

Have you ever had a colleague who communicates via email even though he or she is sitting right next to you?

Solution: Post-it notes. For each email they send, you reply on a sticky note. They’ll soon come unstuck. Not to mention your workspace will become very colourful.

• Tea Takers

That person who’ll always accept a brew but rarely makes one for anyone else.

Solution: Store all the tea and coffee in cash box with a combination lock. If they don’t make any for the office, they can’t make it for themselves either.

• Loquacious Loo

Office loos used to be sacred places; a retreat to think about life. Now said serenity is gone, replaced by tweeters and talkers who can’t get off their iPhones.

Solution: Megaphone. Just repeat whatever you hear. Silence will soon return.

• Overblown Oversharing

Some people love to share what’s going on in their lives. But the more they share, the more awkward the stories get.

Solution: Carry around an emergency exit sign. If someone’s getting a little too personal, just take it out of your pocket and hold it up.

These are some of the #Office404s you can encounter, but we’re sure you’ve got plenty of your own. Why not share them in the comments?

Do you like lists? Check out our other #Top10 blog posts:

• Top 10 Pens
• Top 10 Office Movies
• Top 10 Printers
• Top 10 Essentials for New Businesses